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Ken

Ken Howard, LCSW, is licensed psychotherapist and life/career coach who has specialized in working with gay men, as individuals and couples, for over 23 years. He helps many gay men (and others) resolve the issues that undermine your quality of life, and helps you to thrive.

Three Keys for a Successful Gay Life: Something to Do, Love, and Hope For

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There is a quote from philosopher Emmanuel Kant that says that we need three things to succeed in life:  “Something to Do, Someone to Love, and Something to Hope For.”  In my psychotherapy practice specializing in therapy and coaching for gay men, when I see truly thriving people, I think these three things are key … Read more

Managing Recession Anxiety: How to Cope with Layoff

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gay depressed man

[THIS WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN 2009, DURING THE “GREAT RECESSION”.  HOWEVER, IT IS STILL RELEVANT TODAY FOR ANYONE REGARDING THE TOPIC OF LAYOFF OR JOB LOSS, OR EVEN WORK SLOWDOWN DURING ANY ECONOMICALLY-STRESSED TIME.] While the current economic recession* (2009) may spare many of us as gay men, who are often considered an “affluent” segment … Read more

Finding Mr. Right in Gay Men’s Dating: The Six Lights Theory

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In my private practice as a psychotherapist, I work frequently with gay couples seeking conjoint therapy to address a variety of challenges in their relationships.  In my practice in therapy for gay men since 1992, I have come to notice certain consistent patterns in what drives conflict between either long-term couples, or couples who recently … Read more

Inspiration from Music: Dolly Parton’s “Better Get to Livin'”

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In my work as a psychotherapist and life coach, I am always grateful for the many and varied sources of inspiration that come my way.  The latest uplifting piece of material I’ve come across is in music, and in another article, I’ve written about songs that can be inspiring and empowering.  There is a relatively … Read more

Breaking the Ice: Gay Men’s Conversational Skills and How to Use Therapy to Overcome Shyness

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As a psychotherapist in private practice focusing on gay men, I love the diversity I see in my work.  No two clients are alike, except for one issue that I see frequently – which is social anxiety.  Many guys come to me and want help to overcome shyness.  One of the biggest misconceptions that I’ve … Read more

Twelve Tips for a Successful Hospital Stay

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My recent three-day stay in a somewhat-small-by-LA-standards but rather posh urban hospital took away the up-until-now, 43-year virginity I had to hospital stays. I had no idea what to expect, but now that I’m out, I wanted to share my experience so that perhaps I might be of help to someone else who is facing … Read more

Election Blues from Panicking Pollster

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Dear Shrink,

I’m a 22-year-old gay male and I’m a little too deep into election news. I can’t get enough of the news, information online, and newspaper and magazine articles. I follow the polls like a stalker, hoping that my favored candidate is ahead. If we get another anti-gay President, I’m going to scream. How do I deal with my election obsession?

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Supportive an HIV-Positive Family Member – “The Worried Mom”

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counseling and coaching for gay men

Dear Ken,

My son is 26 years old, and I’m his mother. I live in a suburb of a major American city. My son just told me he is HIV-positive. How do I respond to this? I love my son, and I want him to be happy and healthy, but I’m just now sure “how” to react. Any advice?

Signed, Worried Mom

Dear Worried Mom,

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