Gay Male Relationships: How Can I Prevent My Partner from Cheating? Common Reasons for Cheating and How to Manage Them

man sneaking dollar photo

In my psychotherapy practice specializing in gay male individuals and gay male couples over the past 24 years, I have worked with many guys who need help because they are upset after discovering that their boyfriend or partner/spouse was “cheating” on them. I hesitate to even use the word “cheating” because it implies that it’s … Read more

Tips on How to Manage Money in a Gay Relationship

kh pp gay male couple on beach at sunset adobe photo

As a therapist in private practice who has specialized in working almost exclusively with gay men for over 27 years, I have seen many individuals and couples who come in for help with issues related to managing money.  There are few issues for either individuals or couples that provoke more anxiety than money, especially if … Read more

Finding Mr. Right in Gay Men’s Dating: The Six Lights Theory

modem

In my private practice as a psychotherapist, I work frequently with gay couples seeking conjoint therapy to address a variety of challenges in their relationships.  In my practice in therapy for gay men since 1992, I have come to notice certain consistent patterns in what drives conflict between either long-term couples, or couples who recently … Read more

No More ‘Cheating’ Part II: How Gay Men Can Have an Open Relationship Without Hurt Feelings

smiling gay male couple on a beach
gay male couple on beach
Gay men in open relationships need lots of communication.

Part II: Identifying and Implementing Your Options

In my previous article, Part I of this topic, I described how in my work as a psychotherapist specializing in gay men and their relationships, very often I see couples expressing a desire to eliminate “cheating” in a relationship by bravely, candidly, and sensitively discussing their options about how and why either or both partners might desire occasional sex outside the relationship, and how this does not have to be unhealthy or damaging to the relationship. Studies of gay male relationships over the years have explained how it is culturally relatively more acceptable in gay male relationships (more so than in any other kind of human relationship) to have a primary partner but allow sexual play with others.

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