Gay Men Who Have Given Up on Finding a Relationship

lonely man in peacoat on beach looking out deposit photo 11 6 22

Gay Men Who Have Given Up on Finding a Relationship In my thirty years (2022) of being a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist and life/career/relationship coach, perhaps the most common topic new clients present to me in asking for help is about relationships (and, relatedly, sex).  There are other topics, too, about raising your quality of … Read more

Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART TWO

man on mountaintop

Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART TWO In Part One of this discussion, I talked about coping with specific traumas that include Medical, Legal, Academic, and Criminal traumas, and how to cope with them. Here in Part Two, I will discuss Workplace, Family of Origin, Political, and Social/Peer traumas, and how to … Read more

Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART ONE

man in white shirt triumphant black man deposit photo 7 16 22

Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART ONE Throughout my career as a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist (for 30 years in 2022), I’ve helped a lot of gay men who have been the victims – and survivors – of various kinds of trauma.  I use the terms both “victim” and “survivor” to validate … Read more

PART TWO – Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives

valentine couple deposit photo Feb 2020

Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives – PART TWO In Part One of this article, I discussed topics that are a “no-go” in gay men’s dating situations, such as racism/bigotry, money neurosis, unresolved trauma, and several more. As a long-term (30 years in 2022) gay men’s specialist psychotherapist for individuals, … Read more

Gay Men’s Sexuality: Focus on the Five Senses for Better Functioning

gay couple in bed one dark hair one gray hair deposit photo 4 11 22

Gay Men’s Sexuality: Focus on the Five Senses for Better Functioning In my experience as a gay men’s specialist therapist these 30 years now in 2022, and more recently as an AASECT nationally Certified Sex Therapist, I’ve had quite a few guys want to work with me frankly and honestly about their quality of life, … Read more

Mental Health Aspects of Sexual Health for Gay Men

smiling gay male couple in bed deposit photo April 2021

Mental Health Aspects of Sexual Health for Gay Men As a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist and coach for now 30 years (in 2022), and as a Certified Psychiatric Social Worker, and now AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, perhaps it follows that I might be interested in sharing some thoughts about the intersection of psychiatric disorders, physical … Read more

Gay Men and Coping with ‘Bad Luck’

man clutching head in overalls deposit photo 2 5 22

Gay Men and Coping with ‘Bad Luck’ This year, 2022, marks my thirtieth year as a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist.  I’m also an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, and life/career/relationship coach, for gay men in Los Angeles/West Hollywood, California, all over the United States, and the world.  And one of the things I’ve noticed in working … Read more

Gay Men and How to Ruin a Friendship:   Ten Tips

lonely man on college campus as others talk deposit photo September 2021

Gay Men and How to Ruin a Friendship:   Ten Tips In my 29 years as a gay men’s specialist therapist in Los Angeles, as well as being an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, and life/career/executive coach for guys all over the world, I’ve helped a lot of guys with interpersonal relationships.  This can be about dating, … Read more

The Needs of Gay Men in the Volatile “LGBT” Era

stars and stripes rainbow flag deosit photo June 2021

The Needs of Gay Men in the Volatile “LGBT” Era A couple of years ago, I wrote about some concerns I had overall about the gradual adoption of “LGBT” (or its variants like LGBTQ, LGBTQ+, etc.) as the umbrella term for referring to all sexual and gender minority persons in society (that article is here … Read more

Gay Men and Gym Crushes: Cherish Your Romantic Notions

gym crush man at gym gray tank top June 2021 deposit photo

Gay Men and Gym Crushes: Cherish Your Romantic Notions Recently, a friend of mine at lunch mentioned that someone at a nearby table looked like his “gym crush.”  It turned out not to be, and my friend told another story, but his use of the terminology stayed with me, and got me thinking.  That term … Read more