Gay Men and Mixing Your Boyfriend with Your Friends

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As a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist for over 30 years, life/career/relationship/executive coach, and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, I hear about a lot of situations gay men face in the course of a week of client sessions in my full-time psychotherapy and coaching practice with gay men mostly in California but also all over the U.S. … Read more

Gay Men and New Year, New Sex: Mind, Heart, Body

interracial gay couple standing deposit photo January 2023

Gay Men and New Year, New Sex: Mind, Heart, Body   Happy New Year!  As I start my 31st year as a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist, life/career/relationship coach, and AASECT-Certified sex therapist, I challenge myself to think of expansive, new ideas.  The new year, for all of us, is like a blank piece of paper … Read more

PART TWO – Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives

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Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives – PART TWO In Part One of this article, I discussed topics that are a “no-go” in gay men’s dating situations, such as racism/bigotry, money neurosis, unresolved trauma, and several more. As a long-term (30 years in 2022) gay men’s specialist psychotherapist for individuals, … Read more

Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives – PART ONE

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Gay Men’s Dating Situations That Are “No-Go” – And Their Alternatives – PART ONE As a long-term (30 years in 2022) gay men’s specialist psychotherapist for individuals, couples, polycules, and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST), I work with guys daily on relationships – finding them, improving them, and, in some cases, coping with ending them. … Read more

Gay Men and How to Avoid the Pitfalls of Dating

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Gay Men and How to Avoid the Pitfalls of Dating In my long (30 years in 2022) practice in psychotherapy as a specialist in gay male individuals and couples, I see trends that pop up every few months or so.  These past couple of weeks have been marked by a trend about single gay men … Read more

Gay Men’s Relationships: How to Deal with Your Ex

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Maybe this title is misleading, because maybe, as a gay man who has left a relationship, you don’t want to “deal” with your ex at all.  And yet lately, in my therapy and coaching practice as a gay men’s specialist and AASECT-Certified sex therapist, I’ve been helping a lot of guys on the topic of coping … Read more

Gay Counselor on Why Nerds Make the Best Boyfriends 

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As a gay counselor (therapist, coach, sex therapist – I do all of those) for 28 years, I always enjoy when discussions with my clients inspire me to write on a blog topic because “life’s truths” just seem to jump out at us in discussion.  One of these was recently when I found myself saying, “I’m convinced … Read more

Gay Men’s Relationships: Reconciling the Living Room with the Bedroom

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Gay Men’s Relationships: Reconciling the Living Room with the Bedroom In my long career (27 years) working with gay male couples as a therapist and relationship coach, I tend to see the same problems gay male couples have in therapy over and over – but, fortunately, there are often similar solutions.  One of the professional … Read more

Gay Couples Therapy Challenges:  “My Partner Isn’t Contributing Equally!”

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One of the most common themes I hear in my psychotherapy practice in Los Angeles (specializing in therapy and coaching for gay men, and gay male couples, for over 27 years) is in relationships (Gay Relationship Inequality) where one partner has a complaint that he feels his partner is not “making an equal contribution to … Read more

Gay Men and Ghosting: Why We Do It, How We Cope

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Gay Men and Ghosting:  Why We Do It, How We Cope In the blogosphere, there have already been some articles on gay men and ghosting, but none of them go into any real depth from a mental health point of view, and in my 26 years as a psychotherapist who specializes in therapy for gay … Read more