Ken 
Recently, some clients in my psychotherapy practice, which for 27 years has focused on the mental health and well-being of adult gay men, have been discussing the role and value of a “fuck buddy” in their lives. While all sexual topics (even in our “modern” age) seem to come fraught with controversy these days (and … Read more
When it’s good, it’s very, very good. You’re relaxed. Sounds and sights are more vivid. Everything is a bit funny. Time loses its tyranny. Man, this feeling is great! Well, okay, there’s the clumsiness, hunger and thirst, and distorted senses, but at first, and maybe (for some people) for a very long time, the pluses … Read more
It would be easy if you both earned exactly the same, wouldn’t it? That doesn’t happen in real life, though, and almost every couple deals with an income gap. When the gap is large, you really have to be on your game to keep it from becoming a big and continuing problem. It’s important that … Read more
In my psychotherapy practice as a gay men’s specialty therapist for over 25 years, no topic among couples therapy is more frequent than that of the “monogamy vs. non-monogamy” debate. This is not an easy topic, and trying to over-simplify it just gets you into trouble. It IS, indeed, complex, and it takes time and … Read more
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and its less-severe related diagnosis, Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) can be the topic of jokes and even comedy movies. But living with the actual disorder is no joke. OCD is quite burdensome to live with, and it can make the partners of people living with OCD stressed-out, too. People living with OCD … Read more
Depression is the number one mental health problem in the world and gay men, lesbians, and bisexuals are up to twice as likely to suffer from depression as heterosexuals – not because they inferior human beings (contrary to some religious teachings and other oppression), but because the cumulative stress of heterosexism and homophobia in society, … Read more
Is that you, Jack, your eyes bagged, clothes wrinkled, and face falling into the keyboard over one more Excel spreadsheet or Powerpoint presentation? Hey, we live in America, Puritan work ethic and all that, with fewer vacation days per year than most industrialized countries. And everyone who’s heard the story of “the ant and the … Read more
I’ve been providing relationship coaching and couples therapy for gay men since 1992, and over that time, I’ve noticed some patterns that will help, and hurt, a relationship. Lots of things help, but one that thing than can hurt is complacency. Straight people know all about this; it’s the whole “married-now-let-yourself-go” syndrome — which can … Read more
During my 22 years of clinical practice providing psychotherapy, mostly to both gay (www.GayTherapyLA.com) and straight (www.MensLifeSkillsCenter.com) men, I have helped clients with the well-known challenges that people seek therapy for: depression, anxiety, relationship concerns, career concerns, and loss. The general public knows all of these. But there are more subtle situations and reasons for … Read more
At GayTherapyLA.com, (which can also be accessed via www.PozTherapist.com, to coincide with my identity as a psychotherapist with over 22 years experience providing gay-affirmative therapy to gay men and couples, as well as my 24 years being HIV-positive, and an HIV mental health expert and advocate in Los Angeles), my staff of clinical associates and … Read more
Ken Howard, LCSW, CST is a life/career/executive/relationship coach who has specialized in gay men (individuals and gay male couples) and LGBT+ for over 30 years.
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