How ‘Uptown Funk’ Treadmill Dancer Carson Dean is a Hero for Our Times

This otherwise fairly normal news week in cyberspace was punctuated with a vibrant exclamation point in the form of the viral video  currently circulating the globe from a young Los Angeles gymnast, singer, dancer, model, and choreographer by the name of Carson Dean (or, as he is known most this week, “that guy doing that … Read more

Gay Men and Body Image Struggles: Waiting for the Adonis in the Mirror

man in mirror dollar photo

When you wear extra layers of clothing, even when it’s not really part of the look you’re going for, or to keep warm; or when you stand to the back of every group photo; or when you avoid the gym, the pool, the beach, the hiking trail, or anywhere where you might wear less clothing; … Read more

Fear No Leather: BDSM Play for Gay Men Who Are Scared Stiff

man shirtless with riding crop bdsm deposit photo Feb 2021

Fear No Leather:  Benefits of BDSM Play for Gay Men Who Are Scared Stiff (keywords: gay bdsm, leather, rubber, s/m, b/d, kink) Imagine for a moment that you are overhearing someone talking.  They are saying the following: “Ewwww.  I just don’t get those guys.  That’s just weird.  It’s unnatural.  You’ve got to be sick to … Read more

Of Bears and Twinks: Weight Loss Issues for Gay Men in Therapy

Gay Men’s Culture As a psychotherapist who has specialized in working with gay men for the past 26 years, I know that part of gay men’s culture is an emphasis on a youthful, lean, muscular physique.  The sentiment is pervasive, and competitive — sometimes good-naturedly, sometimes aggressively and cruelly. Gay men’s culture has identified the … Read more

Gay Men and Fitness: Moved to Move…Finding the Mental Motivation for Exercise

kh pp man measuring bicep dollar photo

As a psychotherapist working with gay men in West Hollywood, body image and fitness issues come up more often than if I were practicing with another population in a different place. Our culture “suggests” – some would say vehemently “demands” – high levels of fitness in part for our health but largely for our looks. … Read more

Face It: Lipodystrophy, Lipoatrophy, and Self-Esteem

In the earliest years of the HIV/AIDS epidemic, many people were distressed by the appearance of nickel-sized purple lesions on their bodies and faces that were a visible sign of living with Kaposi’s Sarcoma, an AIDS-related opportunistic infection. The lesions involuntarily “outed” them as having the highly stigmatized disease of AIDS. Society’s reaction to patients with these visible symptoms often caused additional psychological distress to people who were already fighting a host of medical challenges in the days with almost no treatment options.

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