One of the most common topics I help guys with in my psychotherapy and coaching practice (now 22 years) is about improving self-esteem. It makes sense; gay men get a lot of “negative messages” growing up and, cumulatively, they take their toll. Usually in addition to whatever else we are working on (career, finances, relationship … Read more
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and its less-severe related diagnosis, Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) can be the topic of jokes and even comedy movies. But living with the actual disorder is no joke. OCD is quite burdensome to live with, and it can make the partners of people living with OCD stressed-out, too. People living with OCD … Read more
Is that you, Jack, your eyes bagged, clothes wrinkled, and face falling into the keyboard over one more Excel spreadsheet or Powerpoint presentation? Hey, we live in America, Puritan work ethic and all that, with fewer vacation days per year than most industrialized countries. And everyone who’s heard the story of “the ant and the … Read more
I’ve been providing relationship coaching and couples therapy for gay men since 1992, and over that time, I’ve noticed some patterns that will help, and hurt, a relationship. Lots of things help, but one that thing than can hurt is complacency. Straight people know all about this; it’s the whole “married-now-let-yourself-go” syndrome — which can … Read more
During my 22 years of clinical practice providing psychotherapy, mostly to both gay (www.GayTherapyLA.com) and straight (www.MensLifeSkillsCenter.com) men, I have helped clients with the well-known challenges that people seek therapy for: depression, anxiety, relationship concerns, career concerns, and loss. The general public knows all of these. But there are more subtle situations and reasons for … Read more
One of the positive stereotypes that are assigned to gay men (as welcome respite to so many negative ones) is that we have good taste. Our sense of our clothes, grooming, cars, and homes are respected to be stylish, up-to-date, and of good design and quality. But is this so for everyone? Recently I … Read more
As I think back on the past 24 years (by 2014) of providing couples counseling for gay male relationships, I sometimes get asked what the differences are that I see (in general) in gay male relationships that are (in general) different from straight relationships. In no particular order, below, are some of my thoughts. I … Read more
Happy New Year! I like to send my New Year’s greeting to my subscribers during the SECOND week of the year. Why? Because everyone does it around January 1st, and it’s easy for all the “New Year Resolution/Make This Year Best Year Yet” messages to get mixed up. As inspiring and valuable as material from … Read more
Happy December! How are those New Year’s Resolutions working out for you? You know, the ones that you had in January, almost a year ago? Do you remember what they were? Did you make any? Did you have goals for this year? Did you reach those goals? The other day, I reviewed my Goals List … Read more
Louise Hay and the Power of Thoughts Lately, I’ve been revisiting the writings of Louise Hay, the New Age spiritual author and speaker whom I’ve followed for a long time now. She’s 84, and lives a very vibrant life in San Diego. Her whole message is about loving the self, and using the power of … Read more
Ken Howard, LCSW, CST is a life/career/executive/relationship coach who has specialized in gay men (individuals and gay male couples) and LGBT+ for over 30 years.
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