Memory: Blessing or Curse?

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I thought about this recently, after a particularly busy day of sessions of clients in my practice.  Is having memory a blessing, or a curse? I was moved by stories of clients who are abuse survivors, with their ability to recall the traumatically abusive incidents that happened to them in detail from various self-indulgent and … Read more

Tolerations: Coping with Everyday Stressors in Gay Men’s Lives

Gay men need support for coping with everyday stressors. 

Tolerations:  Coping with Everyday Stressors in Gay Men’s Lives:

I recently asked my Facebook fans to suggest a topic for a blog article.  The first response I got was, “Traffic and MFSAD (MuthaFuckinStupidAssDrivers)” by my handsome and charming friend Michael Smith.  So, Michael, this is for you:

I decided to expand on this topic and address what we therapist/coaches often call “tolerations”.  Tolerations are Life’s little annoyances that subtly but insidiously chip away at our daily quality of life.  While manageable individually, taken collectively, they can make us feel tired, stressed, worn down, despondent, and contribute to a general ennui (listlessness or dissatisfaction, boredom, tedium).

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Gay Men and Alcohol: The Relationship with the Bottle

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Today I wanted to write about gay men and alcohol, and what I call their “relationship” with the bottle.  Over my many years as a psychotherapist, one of the most frequent issues my clients bring to me is a concern about their drinking, or perhaps their drug use.  There is a wide range; some people … Read more

Valentine’s Day for Single Gay Men: Coping with Hope

valentine couple deposit photo Feb 2020

Valentine’s Day, for all its lovely sentiment, is perhaps one of the most divisive holidays of the year.  Everyone can enjoy New Year’s; every American can enjoy President’s Day (thankfully coming up very soon) and Independence Day; we each have a birthday.  But Valentine’s Day is a “holiday for lovers”, and many single people can end … Read more

Gay Men Conquering Anxiety with… Probability??

edward everett horton

Gay Men Conquering Anxiety:   Think about how you’ve been  feeling lately.  Felt any anxiety? If no, perhaps get another cup of coffee, read another blog, or go back to work.  🙂 But my guess is, yes, you have felt at least some anxiety about something in relatively recent times.  Like maybe this morning. I … Read more

Conquering Self-Doubt as “The Gay Male Creative Solo Entrepreneur”

Conquering Self-Doubt as “The Gay Male Creative Solo Entrepreneur” Someone asked me recently what I did for a living.  Fair question, common question, but I gave an uncommon answer:  “I’m a licensed psychotherapist and life/business coach who focuses on helping the gay male creative solo entrepreneur close the gap between how life is, and how … Read more

January 22, 2011: My Xtranormal Adventure: ‘Selecting a Gym in West Hollywood’

By now, many people have seen the Xtranormal.com video, “Selecting a Gym in West Hollywood”.  In fact, as of today, 8,699 people have seen it on YouTube, and on the original Xtranormal.com site, 13,753. What many people don’t know is, I wrote it — along with my husband, Michael Ryan.  We were just kind of … Read more

January 8, 2011: New Year, New Hip, New Movies (“Black Swan”/”The King’s Speech”)

Happy New Year! In the January issue of my e-newsletter, “Self-Empowerment: Have the Life You Want!”, I’ll be discussing how to set your goals for 2011 to feel empowered to make the positive changes in your life that you want to see over the next 12 months. Sign up now on my home page to … Read more

December 21, 2010: Hobbling Around and Taking a Closer Look

I’ve been less active, overall, since recovering from total hip replacement surgery on my right hip on December 6 (the left one was done in April, 2008, so I kind of know the drill). As I hobble around, walking with the aid of a cane for about the next two months while I undergo physical … Read more

December 16, 2010: The HIV ‘Cure’ and Never Say Never

With the news this week that a man has been declared officially “cured” of HIV by way of stem cell therapy (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/12/14/hiv-cure-berlin-patient_n_796521.html), I was heartened, to say the least. Immediately, my mind went to two things: one was about what this means for the immediate future of HIV eradication research, and how soon could something … Read more