How Gay Men Can Face Any Problem: Developing Resilience – Part 1: Traits

arms to sky

Whether it’s Trump’s election and his appointment of virulently anti-gay cabinet members (my article on that is here), or just everyday life challenges that would be there regardless, gay men need support to face stressors of various kinds.  Things happen that are barriers, setbacks, and losses, and when they do, we need to mobilize both … Read more

Gay Therapist Reviews “Florence Foster Jenkins” (2016): Shrink at the Movies

[SPOILER ALERT: SOME PLOT POINTS REVEALED] For readers who are unfamiliar with this series, “Shrink at the Movies” is a not-very-consistent string of essays (ponderings, I like to call them) from my point of view as both a licensed psychotherapist in California (Licensed Clinical Social Worker, or LCSW) and as a life-long movie fan.  Being … Read more

How ‘Uptown Funk’ Treadmill Dancer Carson Dean is a Hero for Our Times

This otherwise fairly normal news week in cyberspace was punctuated with a vibrant exclamation point in the form of the viral video  currently circulating the globe from a young Los Angeles gymnast, singer, dancer, model, and choreographer by the name of Carson Dean (or, as he is known most this week, “that guy doing that … Read more

Gay Men’s Success in Building a Business or Self-Employment: If You Build It, They Will Come

baseball player dollar photo

One of the things that I do in my practice as a specialist in therapy for gay men (27 years), as well as career coaching for gay men, that most other therapists don’t do, is that I provide career and business coaching sessions (in my office, over the phone, or over Skype) for guys who … Read more

Gay Men and Marijuana Over-Use: Getting Clean from Green

kh pp marijuana leaf dollar photo

When it’s good, it’s very, very good. You’re relaxed. Sounds and sights are more vivid. Everything is a bit funny. Time loses its tyranny. Man, this feeling is great! Well, okay, there’s the clumsiness, hunger and thirst, and distorted senses, but at first, and maybe (for some people) for a very long time, the pluses … Read more

The 8 Subtle Signs You Could Benefit from Therapy/Coaching

During my 22 years of clinical practice providing psychotherapy, mostly to both gay (www.GayTherapyLA.com) and straight (www.MensLifeSkillsCenter.com) men, I have helped clients with the well-known challenges that people seek therapy for: depression, anxiety, relationship concerns, career concerns, and loss.  The general public knows all of these.  But there are more subtle situations and reasons for … Read more

Gay Men’s Domiciles: Is Your House a Home?

house with coins adobe photo

  One of the positive stereotypes that are assigned to gay men (as welcome respite to so many negative ones) is that we have good taste.  Our sense of our clothes, grooming, cars, and homes are respected to be stylish, up-to-date, and of good design and quality.  But is this so for everyone?  Recently I … Read more

Of Bears and Twinks: Weight Loss Issues for Gay Men in Therapy

Gay Men’s Culture As a psychotherapist who has specialized in working with gay men for the past 26 years, I know that part of gay men’s culture is an emphasis on a youthful, lean, muscular physique.  The sentiment is pervasive, and competitive — sometimes good-naturedly, sometimes aggressively and cruelly. Gay men’s culture has identified the … Read more

The Clarity through Contrast Worksheet: Identifying Your Core Values as a Gay Man

The Clarity Through Contrast Worksheet:  Identifying Your Core Values as a Gay Man As a psychotherapist and career/life coach who has specialized working with  gay men for over 20 years, much of my work involves helping my clients get what they want in life.  But how do you KNOW what you really want?  Some of … Read more