Self-Empowerment Through Music: The ‘Power Playlist’

If you’re like me, you can’t go to the gym without your music.  I derive inspiration, energy, and stamina from my personal selections of playlists to energize my entire fitness routine.  At home, I will put on music when I have to do some mindless but nevertheless necessary chore.  And when I’m feeling not-so-great, physically … Read more

How to Have an Olympic Life: Gold, Silver, Bronze

Have you been watching the Olympics?  Are you impressed with the skill, style, determination, stamina, endurance, grace, and aesthetics of the athletes doing what they do best?  If you’re like millions of people across the world during these weeks, you are. Seeing various Olympic events gets me thinking about how these athletes are in many … Read more

Gay Therapists Gives Tips on How Gay Men Build Confidence

One of the most common themes I see in my office doing counseling, psychotherapy, and coaching with gay male individuals and gay couples is that of low self-esteem and low self-confidence.  It’s not surprising; as little gay boys, we get exposed to anti-gay messages outright, or at least to the “invisibility” that comes with the … Read more

Gay Men’s Careers: The Importance of Focus and Hope in Your Work

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In psychotherapy and coaching sessions with my gay male clients every day, I’ve noticed lately that a frequent focus is about work issues.  This makes sense, given that the news and current events atmosphere has focused on a volatile political and economic climate: we get bombarded with news daily, from everything from Facebook to newspaper … Read more

Memory: Blessing or Curse?

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I thought about this recently, after a particularly busy day of sessions of clients in my practice.  Is having memory a blessing, or a curse? I was moved by stories of clients who are abuse survivors, with their ability to recall the traumatically abusive incidents that happened to them in detail from various self-indulgent and … Read more

Gay Men’s Career Confidence: Do You Have ‘Professional Self-Esteem’?

What is professional self-esteem? In recent years in my psychotherapy practice, I have noticed a dramatic increase in the demand for more “coaching”-style services, and I have been happy to develop this for my clients. There are personal coaching issues, to be sure, but what I find much more frequently is that clients need professional … Read more

Self-Empowerment for Gay Men and the Three Resources: Time, Energy, Money

Self-empowerment for gay men means managing your resources of time, energy, and money. 

Over the course of my 18 years as a psychotherapist in private practice in West Hollywood, California, I’ve come to utilize a number of phrases that summarize the wisdom of various theorists from Sigmund Freud, the “founder” of psychotherapy, to Louise Hay, an 80’s New Age inspirational author. But, also along the way, I’ve developed a few phrases of my own, “Ken-isms” I like to call them, based on my many observations, that have helped many people in various classic problem situations that I see over and over. Perhaps my favorite concept in treatment is “self-empowerment” (which is the name of my upcoming book, Self-Empowerment: Have the Life You Want!), because I believe in helping people empower themselves to improve their quality of life in various areas, such as your health, mental health, relationships, career, and finances. One of my favorite “Ken-isms” is encouraging my clients to spend their resources of Time, Energy, and Money according to their Values, Priorities, and Goals. What does this mean? Let’s take each one of those six elements:

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Three Keys for a Successful Gay Life: Something to Do, Love, and Hope For

There is a quote from philosopher Emmanuel Kant that says that we need three things to succeed in life:  “Something to Do, Someone to Love, and Something to Hope For.”  In my psychotherapy practice specializing in therapy and coaching for gay men, when I see truly thriving people, I think these three things are key … Read more

Inspiration from Music: Dolly Parton’s “Better Get to Livin'”

In my work as a psychotherapist and life coach, I am always grateful for the many and varied sources of inspiration that come my way.  The latest uplifting piece of material I’ve come across is in music, and in another article, I’ve written about songs that can be inspiring and empowering.  There is a relatively … Read more