Over the course of my 18 years as a psychotherapist in private practice in West Hollywood, California, I’ve come to utilize a number of phrases that summarize the wisdom of various theorists from Sigmund Freud, the “founder” of psychotherapy, to Louise Hay, an 80’s New Age inspirational author. But, also along the way, I’ve developed a few phrases of my own, “Ken-isms” I like to call them, based on my many observations, that have helped many people in various classic problem situations that I see over and over. Perhaps my favorite concept in treatment is “self-empowerment” (which is the name of my upcoming book, Self-Empowerment: Have the Life You Want!), because I believe in helping people empower themselves to improve their quality of life in various areas, such as your health, mental health, relationships, career, and finances. One of my favorite “Ken-isms” is encouraging my clients to spend their resources of Time, Energy, and Money according to their Values, Priorities, and Goals. What does this mean? Let’s take each one of those six elements:
Life Skills
Helping Hands, Stronger Hands – by Galia Myron
Written by Galia Myron Thursday, 14 January 2010 13:55 Elderly volunteers are less likely to suffer from frailty than their peers who work for pay. Volunteering may provide protection against frailty as we age, says a study from UCLA that found that when compared to child care and working for pay. Frailty in the … Read more
Boo! Scary – Conquering Your Fears
I love Halloween. Maybe it’s because of the theatricality of it, with costumes and props, or maybe it’s because of my addiction to chocolate. Author Peg Aloi, an expert on Pagan holidays, explains that Halloween, or “Samhain” as it is sometimes called (which means “summer’s end”), is observed as a celebration of the last harvest … Read more
Three Keys for a Successful Gay Life: Something to Do, Love, and Hope For
There is a quote from philosopher Emmanuel Kant that says that we need three things to succeed in life: “Something to Do, Someone to Love, and Something to Hope For.” In my psychotherapy practice specializing in therapy and coaching for gay men, when I see truly thriving people, I think these three things are key … Read more
Managing Recession Anxiety: How to Cope with Layoff
[THIS WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN 2009, DURING THE “GREAT RECESSION”. HOWEVER, IT IS STILL RELEVANT TODAY FOR ANYONE REGARDING THE TOPIC OF LAYOFF OR JOB LOSS, OR EVEN WORK SLOWDOWN DURING ANY ECONOMICALLY-STRESSED TIME.] While the current economic recession* (2009) may spare many of us as gay men, who are often considered an “affluent” segment … Read more
The Golden Boys: Gay Men at Midlife
Ken gives nine tips for how gay men can thrive at midlife and beyond.
Inspiration from Music: Dolly Parton’s “Better Get to Livin'”
In my work as a psychotherapist and life coach, I am always grateful for the many and varied sources of inspiration that come my way. The latest uplifting piece of material I’ve come across is in music, and in another article, I’ve written about songs that can be inspiring and empowering. There is a relatively … Read more
Breaking the Ice: Gay Men’s Conversational Skills and How to Use Therapy to Overcome Shyness
As a psychotherapist in private practice focusing on gay men, I love the diversity I see in my work. No two clients are alike, except for one issue that I see frequently – which is social anxiety. Many guys come to me and want help to overcome shyness. One of the biggest misconceptions that I’ve … Read more
Twelve Tips for a Successful Hospital Stay
My recent three-day stay in a somewhat-small-by-LA-standards but rather posh urban hospital took away the up-until-now, 43-year virginity I had to hospital stays. I had no idea what to expect, but now that I’m out, I wanted to share my experience so that perhaps I might be of help to someone else who is facing … Read more
PodCast Episode 2: Living in Gratitude
http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=269518430 Ken gives helpful tips to start your day on a good note, and end your day with appreciation for all that the day has brought.