Quickly try this exercise: Think about where you were 15 years ago, in the Spring of 2001. Where were you working? Where did you go for lunch? Who was your favorite co-worker? Who was your least-favorite co-worker? Now, who was President? (I bet that took a second, right?). Because when we think about the course … Read more
Have you been bothered by having nightmares or bad dreams? Today I wanted to write about gay men and sleep, and coping with nightmares. This comes up frequently either with clients in my office, or when I do online counseling or coaching for gay men all over the country, or the world. Yesterday in my … Read more
While I do mainstream psychotherapy sessions in my office for people with depression, anxiety, trauma, relationship conflicts, and many psychological disorders, I’ve also had many requests for career coaching in the past year especially. Many guys have friends, bosses, family, and maybe even a mentor of sorts, but career coaching fulfills something none of these … Read more
Gay Men’s Mental Health: 5 Tips for an Optimal Spring/Summer Spring has sprung! Spring is a nice time of year for many people, because things like the doldrums of winter can be shaken off and the spring/summer seasons can usually bring a lot of nice things like sunshine, outdoor socializing, extra daylight to work/play in, … Read more
Many factors affect your quality of life, just day-to-day. But one tip that I have used that helps me, and the clients I counsel and coach, is to keep perspective about your personal life, your work, and your social life in an historical context of the age in history in which we live. Many people … Read more
Gay men in crisis are usually experiencing an event that is outside your everyday routine, and it requires a special response. It involves a rallying of what I call “internal resources” — such as calm, focus, determination, courage, and persistence, as well as outside resources, which could include things like emergency medical help, psychiatric emergency … Read more
Sounds dire, doesn’t it? Here you are, doing the good, hard work it takes to get clean and sober. But on top of your daily struggle, you’re warned (usually in AA) that you may have four other demons to confront: Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. These are the unsettlers that may tempt you to head back … Read more
Happy New Year! I like to send my New Year’s greeting to my subscribers during the SECOND week of the year. Why? Because everyone does it around January 1st, and it’s easy for all the “New Year Resolution/Make This Year Best Year Yet” messages to get mixed up. As inspiring and valuable as material from … Read more
If you’re like me, you can’t go to the gym without your music. I derive inspiration, energy, and stamina from my personal selections of playlists to energize my entire fitness routine. At home, I will put on music when I have to do some mindless but nevertheless necessary chore. And when I’m feeling not-so-great, physically … Read more
One of the most common themes I see in my office doing counseling, psychotherapy, and coaching with gay male individuals and gay couples is that of low self-esteem and low self-confidence. It’s not surprising; as little gay boys, we get exposed to anti-gay messages outright, or at least to the “invisibility” that comes with the … Read more
Ken Howard, LCSW, CST is a life/career/executive/relationship coach who has specialized in gay men (individuals and gay male couples) and LGBT+ for over 30 years.
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