How to Improve a Gay Male Relationship: The Boyfriend “Owner’s Manual”

You’ve bought appliances, electronics, all kinds of gadgets, right? So, how do you know how they work? Maybe you’ve seen someone else use the same thing, but often when we buy something, and it’s even a little complicated (electronic, mechanical, etc.), we consult the Owner’s Manual that comes in the box to learn how to … Read more

Therapy and Coaching for Gay Male Actors, Writers, Designers, and Other Creative Professionals: Celebrating Success, Managing Challenges

kh pp comedy tragedy masks gold dollar photo

As a psychotherapist and career coach in Los Angeles for over 28 years who specializes in gay men, the founder of GayTherapyLA.com, it’s inevitable that I would work with quite a few creative professionals:  actors, television writers, models, singers, designers, and others in the course of a year.  This year has been especially active with … Read more

Gay Men’s Mental Health: 5 Tips for an Optimal Spring/Summer

kh pp man in pool summer dollar photo

Gay Men’s Mental Health:  5 Tips for an Optimal Spring/Summer Spring has sprung!  Spring is a nice time of year for many people, because things like the doldrums of winter can be shaken off and the spring/summer seasons can usually bring a lot of nice things like sunshine, outdoor socializing, extra daylight to work/play in, … Read more

A Gay Therapist Weighs in on Gay Men and the Bar/Club/Party Scene: When Is ‘Enough is Enough’?

kh pp disco ball adobe photo

[A friend of mine who has experience in bar/club promotion was talking to me at an Oscar party and was waxing philosophical about a variety of issues in the gay community.  We are both middle-aged, and he was musing about when “enough is enough” for gay men in participating in the bar/club/party scene.  He told … Read more

Gay Men in Common Crisis Situations: Steps for Handling Them

frustration dollar photo

Gay men in crisis are usually experiencing an event that is outside your everyday routine, and it requires a special response.  It involves a rallying of what I call “internal resources” — such as calm, focus, determination, courage, and persistence, as well as outside resources, which could include things like emergency medical help, psychiatric emergency … Read more

Gay Men’s Success in Building a Business or Self-Employment: If You Build It, They Will Come

baseball player dollar photo

One of the things that I do in my practice as a specialist in therapy for gay men (27 years), as well as career coaching for gay men, that most other therapists don’t do, is that I provide career and business coaching sessions (in my office, over the phone, or over Skype) for guys who … Read more

The Value of Flirtations in a Gay Male Monogamous Relationship

kh pp yoga man outside dollar photo

Not long ago, one of my clients, “Ryan” (not his real name) gave me permission to talk about one of his experiences in therapy for this blog.  He was talking about flirtations.  Ryan and his partner have been in a long-term, monogamous relationship for about 6 years.  But truth be told, even though they only … Read more

Beyond New Year’s Resolutions: Gay Men Making Real Life Changes

kh pp confident man dollar photo

Gay men making real life changes goes beyond making new year’s resolutions.  While “resolutions” are a bit a of cliche, where for many of us, the motivated and desired changes you make January 1 fade by the time February comes, making necessary changes is a hard process, even when we realize it’s important to make … Read more

Three’s Company: The Right Way and the Wrong Way to Have a Gay Men’s Three-Way

three gay men remote dollar photo 1

A therapist’s office (similar to a physician’s or lawyer’s office) is a place to talk about things that would be difficult to talk about almost anywhere else except behind closed doors at home.  This is why psychotherapy has a long tradition of strict confidentiality:  what’s said in therapy, stays in therapy, with the exception of … Read more

Gay Men and Body Image Struggles: Waiting for the Adonis in the Mirror

man in mirror dollar photo

When you wear extra layers of clothing, even when it’s not really part of the look you’re going for, or to keep warm; or when you stand to the back of every group photo; or when you avoid the gym, the pool, the beach, the hiking trail, or anywhere where you might wear less clothing; … Read more