In the timeless tale of Cinderella, a neglected girl is transformed—through magic, resilience, and the help of a mentor—into someone who is seen, valued, and desired. While this fairy tale has enchanted generations, its deeper themes resonate powerfully with many gay men: those whose early lives were marked by invisibility, shame, or bullying, and a … Read more
By Ken Howard, LCSW, CST GayTherapyLA.com | GayCoachingLA.com Ken@GayTherapyLA.com | 310-339-5778 “If It’s Hysterical, It’s Historical” There’s a phrase that gets thrown around in recovery circles: “If it’s hysterical, it’s historical.” Meaning, if your emotional reaction feels out of proportion to the moment, you might be reacting to something much older, deeper, and unresolved. For … Read more
Gay Men and Coping with the Forms of Betrayal By Ken Howard, LCSW, CST GayTherapyLA.com | GayCoachingLA.com Call/Text: 310-339-5778 | Email: Ken@GayTherapyLA.com Introduction: What Is Betrayal? Betrayal is the violation of a person’s trust, often involving the breaking of implicit or explicit expectations in a close relationship. Psychologist Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D., defines betrayal as … Read more
Positive Masculinity: Redefining Strength for Gay Men By Ken Howard, LCSW, CST Founder, GayTherapyLA.com It feels like everyone’s talking about masculinity right now—what it is, what it isn’t, and who gets to define it. For gay men, this isn’t just a cultural conversation. It’s personal. Too often, we’ve been told we’re not “real men.” But … Read more
Over my long (32 years in 2024) career in being a gay men’s specialist therapist, one of the most frequent reasons guys reach out to me to schedule a session is because they are dealing with the emotionally awful aftermath of the breakup of a relationship. This kind of loss is especially painful; there are … Read more
Gay Men and How to Reach Your Full Potential From my perspective as a long term (31 years in 2023) gay men’s specialist psychotherapist and life/career/relationship coach, I often focus on helping gay men reach your full potential. Another way of saying this, which has been a long-term theme of my practice, is to help … Read more
Gay Men, Activism, and Social Conscience While being a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist, sex therapist, and life/career/executive coach for over 30 years in 2023, I’ve also strongly identified within my graduate training and licensure/professional discipline category of being a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) in the state of California. California has several licenses that allow … Read more
Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART TWO In Part One of this discussion, I talked about coping with specific traumas that include Medical, Legal, Academic, and Criminal traumas, and how to cope with them. Here in Part Two, I will discuss Workplace, Family of Origin, Political, and Social/Peer traumas, and how to … Read more
Gay Men and Coping with Specific Traumas – PART ONE Throughout my career as a gay men’s specialist psychotherapist (for 30 years in 2022), I’ve helped a lot of gay men who have been the victims – and survivors – of various kinds of trauma. I use the terms both “victim” and “survivor” to validate … Read more
As a very long-term (28 years) specialist in therapy for gay men, I’m asked often for gay men’s relationship advice, especially how to overcome some of the most common and classic challenges in gay relationships. Among these are questions about gay relationship situational difficulties that have to do with where and how we live, such as … Read more
