This otherwise fairly normal news week in cyberspace was punctuated with a vibrant exclamation point in the form of the viral video currently circulating the globe from a young Los Angeles gymnast, singer, dancer, model, and choreographer by the name of Carson Dean (or, as he is known most this week, “that guy doing that … Read more
[A friend of mine who has experience in bar/club promotion was talking to me at an Oscar party and was waxing philosophical about a variety of issues in the gay community. We are both middle-aged, and he was musing about when “enough is enough” for gay men in participating in the bar/club/party scene. He told … Read more
Many factors affect your quality of life, just day-to-day. But one tip that I have used that helps me, and the clients I counsel and coach, is to keep perspective about your personal life, your work, and your social life in an historical context of the age in history in which we live. Many people … Read more
Gay men in crisis are usually experiencing an event that is outside your everyday routine, and it requires a special response. It involves a rallying of what I call “internal resources” — such as calm, focus, determination, courage, and persistence, as well as outside resources, which could include things like emergency medical help, psychiatric emergency … Read more
As a psychotherapist who has worked as a specialist in gay men’s and HIV mental health for over 23 years, I have always maintained that HIV/AIDS is more than a medical issue; it’s a psychosocial one as well. As Chair of the LA County HIV Mental Health Task Force for 9 years, we advocated for … Read more
Gay men making real life changes goes beyond making new year’s resolutions. While “resolutions” are a bit a of cliche, where for many of us, the motivated and desired changes you make January 1 fade by the time February comes, making necessary changes is a hard process, even when we realize it’s important to make … Read more
Would you like to earn more money, work in the field you want, and make steady progress until you’re at the height of your chosen career field? Most gay men (and, indeed, most people) that I know would say “yes” to all of those. However, only some will achieve that. In general, gay men deal … Read more
When you wear extra layers of clothing, even when it’s not really part of the look you’re going for, or to keep warm; or when you stand to the back of every group photo; or when you avoid the gym, the pool, the beach, the hiking trail, or anywhere where you might wear less clothing; … Read more
Sounds dire, doesn’t it? Here you are, doing the good, hard work it takes to get clean and sober. But on top of your daily struggle, you’re warned (usually in AA) that you may have four other demons to confront: Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. These are the unsettlers that may tempt you to head back … Read more
In my private practice of psychotherapy and coaching, I enjoy working with gay men (and others) of all ages. While I see many guys at midlife (especially for relationship or career issues), I also work with younger gay men (also for relationship and career issues!). I admire the young guys I see, and their outlook … Read more
Ken Howard, LCSW, CST is a life/career/executive/relationship coach who has specialized in gay men (individuals and gay male couples) and LGBT+ for over 30 years.
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